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Zach Braff Quotes

Total quotes: 27
“Dr. Cox: Shower Shorts?

J.D: For the man who has nothing to hide, but still wants to.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 3: My Screw Up
Tagged: Shower Shorts, shower, Shy, Embarrassment, hide
“ It's okay, Perry. You just said how you feel. Honestly, I am so full of your love right now, I literally could not take another drop. Brace yourself, I'm coming in. You smell like a father figure.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 8: My Finale, Part 1
Tagged: Love, Father Figure, Fellings, Friendship, Mentor
“Remember when the new Star Wars movie came out? It was all built up, and when people finally saw it, it wasn't that great in bed?”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 1: My Drug Buddy
Tagged: Sex, Expectations, good in bed, Star Wars, Insecure
“Carla: Remember when I first started dating Turk and I wanted to bail on him because he cried at the end of sex?

Turk: Baby!

J.D.: Relax, Brown Bear, there's no shame in cry-maxing.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 5: My Urologist
Tagged: Sex, Crying, Cry-Maxing, orgasm, No Shame
“Danni: Do you even enjoy spending time with me?

J.D.: 'Enjoy' is such a strong word. I... I'm used to it! Y'know, like cafeteria food, or the constant threat of terrorism.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 3: My Choosiest Choice of All
Tagged: hanging out, Spending Time, Used To It, enjoy, Cafeteria Food, Strong Word
“As I looked at all the relationships around me... Some that had gone on forever... some that were reigniting... and some that had just begun... I realized something: It should have been me.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 6: My Cold Shower
Tagged: Love, Regret, Relationships, Forever, Reigniting
“Dr. Cox: Newbie, do you want me to give my "things I don't care about" speech again? Because I've updated it to include all white guys who add -izzle to anything.

J.D.: I agrizzle, my nizzle.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Scrubs Season 4: My Old Friend's New Friend
Tagged: don't care, Speech, White Guys, -izzle, Comeback
“The point is, Elliot. You're a lot stronger than you used to be. I've changed, too... I have a beard now.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 8: My Happy Place
Tagged: strength, Change, beard, Growth
“Elliot: You know I kinda had a date last night?

J.D.: Really?

Elliot: Yeah, a guy on the bus fell asleep on me and drooled on my shoulder.

J.D.: ...You slut.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 1: My Super Ego
Tagged: Dating, sarcastic, bus, drool, Date
“And who's to say this isn't what happens? Who can tell me that my fantasies won't come true? Just this once...”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 8: My Finale, Part 2
Tagged: Fantasy, Reality, Expectations, Ending
“Lucy: Great class, Doctor D! Even better than the one you did with interpretive dance.

J.D.: Thanks, Lucy. I like to call it 'teacher-tainment.' ”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 9: Our Drunk Friend
Tagged: Teacher, Students, Entertainment
“ Jason, when you're filling out a female patient's exam report, her breasts can be "healthy" or "unhealthy," but never "bangin' double-Ds."”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 5: My Intern's Eyes
Tagged: breasts, healthy, unhealthy, Big Breasts, Double-Ds
“ Look, Elliot, I don't know if it's possible for me to put how I feel about you into words, but I guess I'll give it a shot. I never really believed I'd find somebody that I love as much as you. I love you more than anything in the whole world. Elliot, I love you more than Turk.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 8: My Soul on Fire, Part 2
Tagged: Love, Feelings, Words, Whole World, Love You More Than
“J.D.: Oh, God, his ex-wife. The tension actually hurts. You have to break it; say something, anything! [aloud] Banana hammock!

Dr. Cox: I'm betting your ability to thrive under pressure is what drove you to medicine.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 1: My Own Personal Jesus
Tagged: Banana Hammock, tension, Under Pressure, Sassy, awkward
“There are a few things I've always believed in. Flowers are good for any occasion. And nothing is more important than making time for an old friend, especially if the old girl has seen better days. Because even if it breaks your heart to be "just friends," if you really care about someone, you'll take the hit.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 2: My New Old Friend
Tagged: Friends, Flowers, caring, Just Friends
“J.D.: ...That's why it's always nice when someone takes the time to reach out and befriend you.

New Doctor: Hey! I'm Ron, I'm a new doctor here.

J.D.: Hey Ron, the "I don't care" ward's down there.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Scrubs Season 4: My First Kill
Tagged: Befriend, hypocrite, I Don't Care, New, Sassy
“Hey, nice singlet! Does it come in hetero?”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 6: My Friend With Money
Tagged: Fashion, Singlet, Hetero
“I grew up on the street... No, not the hood. The Sesame Street.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 8: My ABC's
Tagged: Sesame Street, Grew Up, Hood, Neighborhood, Growth
“No matter how much we like to pretend otherwise, strong confident women will always have the power over us. Whether they're fighting for respect, fighting for their man, or even just fighting for the hell of it. Strong women make all guys feel the same way.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Scrubs Season 4: My Female Trouble
Tagged: Strong Women, Confidence, Power, Respect, strength
“When I'm with you I feel so safe. Like I'm home.”
— Zach Braff, Garden State
Tagged: Home, Nostalgia, Safe, Feelings, Love, Falling In Love
“Turk: J.D., big news! Guess what my new cell phone number spells!

J.D.: Why'd you get a new cell phone number? Your old number spelled 'kufunninapuh.'

Turk: Yeah, well this one's 916-CALL-TURK. Yeah, so now all you gotta do is call Turk!

J.D.: How'm I supposed to remember that? I'm begging you, stick with 'kufunninapuh'!”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Scrubs Season 4: My Malpractical Decision
Tagged: Friends, Spelling, Change, Big News, cell phone
“J.D.: A baby-moon is a vacation that couples take just before your baby comes out of your special area. And the resort I found is amazing; they have horseback riding, and jet-skiing...

Elliot: Oh, do they also have any punching each other in the stomach contests? Because that's another thing I can't do.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 9: Our Stuff Gets Real
Tagged: Baby, Babymoon, Horseback Riding, Pregnancy, Marriage, Sassy
“Maybe the mistake we make is thinking our parents will change. And maybe they did a better job than we give them credit for. And maybe there, amid all the crap they dumped on us, are some things worth keeping. Like a passion for something you never knew you had. Or the ability to constantly surround yourself with people who love you.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 1: My Old Man
Tagged: Parents, Change, Friends, Love, Growing Up
“Carla: I'm just saying, the only time you guys haven't been together was our honeymoon.

[Turk and J.D. exchange guilty looks]

Turk: Fine. Honey, uh, J.D. and I were together during our honeymoon. He flew in and stayed in the bungalow by the pool. 

J.D.: He forgot his favorite lotion! Was I supposed to let him get ashey?”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 8: My Chief Concern
Tagged: Honeymoon, Best Friends, Bungalow, Love, Guy Love
“I think one of the most universal human experiences is feeling alone. You'd never know it, but there's most likely tons of people feeling the exact same way. Maybe because you're feeling abandoned. Maybe because you realize that you aren't as self-sufficient as you thought. Maybe because you know you should've handled something differently. Or maybe because you aren't as good as you thought you were. Either way, when you hit that low point, you have a choice. You can either wallow in self-pity, or you can suck it up. It's your call.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 1: My Hero
Tagged: Alone, Abandoned, Low Point, Mindset, Choice
“Dr. Cox: Newbie, how you doing?

J.D.: OK, keep it together. It's "be a man" time. [out loud] No, it's fine. You went with your gut. Elliot's a great doctor. I do have three questions, though. Why do you hate me when I show you nothing but love?! Who's going to tell my mom?! And what the hell am I supposed to do with ten thousand "John Dorian, Chief Resident" business cards?!”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Scrubs Season 4: My Office
Tagged: promotion, Disappoinment, Business Cards, Jobs, Questions
“There comes a time when every man needs to make a choice, whether it's a professional choice or whether it's a personal choice. In the end, it's about integrity, and it's about chasing after what you really want, even if that means showing you both care a little. And sometimes... well, sometimes you just have to do what's right for your friend, even if it means sacrificing your own happiness. When it comes down to it, you just have to be proud of the decision you make.”
— John 'J.D.' Dorian, Scrubs, Season 3: My Choosiest Choice of All
Tagged: proud, Integrity, Happiness, Friend, Choice, Sacrifice, decision
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