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Ferris Bueller Quotes

Total quotes: 12
“Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you'd have a diamond.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: High-Maintenance, Anal Personality
“I asked for a car, I got a computer. How's that for being born under a bad sign?”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: computers, Cars
“Ferris: Look, it's real simple. Whatever mileage we put on, we'll take off.

Cameron: How?

Ferris: We'll drive home backwards.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Cars, Mileage
“A: You can never go too far. B: If I'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by a guy like that.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Troublemakers, Getting Caught
“Cameron: Ferris, my father loves this car more than life itself.

Ferris: A man with priorities so far out of whack doesn't deserve such a fine automobile.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Expensive Cars, Priorities
“This is my ninth sick day this semester. It's pretty tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for ten, I'm probably going to have to barf up a lung, so I better make this one count.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Skipping School, Sick Day
“I don't believe in -isms, I just believe in me.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Isims, Believe In Yourself, Belief In Yourself
“ I do have a test today, that wasn't bullshit. It's on European socialism. I mean, really, what's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan on being European. So who gives a crap if they're socialists? They could be fascist anarchists, it still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: European, Socialism
“Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Survival, Meek
“Not that I condone fascism, or any -ism for that matter. -Ism's in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon, 'I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me.' Good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: The Beatles, Believe In Yourself
“Cameron has never been in love - at least, nobody's ever been in love with him. If things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays, and she's gonna treat him like shit, because she will have given him what he has built up in his mind as the end-all, be-all of human existence. She won't respect him, because you can't respect somebody who kisses your ass. It just doesn't work.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Losing Your Virginity, Settling In Love
“The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom; I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh... you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school.”
— Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Tagged: Sick Days, Playing Pretend
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