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Joss Whedon Quotes

Total quotes: 75
“Very occasionally, if you pay really close attention, life doesn’t suck.”
— Joss Whedon, Once More, with Feeling(Buffy soundtrack)
Tagged: Life, life advice, Living, Living A Balanced Life
“I may be dead, but I’m still pretty.”
— Buffy Summers, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season 1: Prophecy Girl
Tagged: dead, Pretty
“Don’t give people what they want, give them what they need.”
— Joss Whedon, Joss Whedon
Tagged: Want, Need, Necessity, Desire
“When I say, I love you, it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are.”
— Joss Whedon,
Tagged: Love, Acceptance, admiration, Understanding
“My life happens to, on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it’s not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they’re too busy with their own. The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling. The loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It’s not. It’s deafening.”
— Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer S3E18
Tagged: Pain, Sadness, Loneliness, Problems
“I’m no good with words. Don’t…don’t use ’em much myself.”
— Jayne Cobb, Firefly, Season 1: Jaynestown
Tagged: Words, Loquaciousness, Silent Type
“Mal: Whatever happens, remember I love you.

Zoë: Sir?

Mal: Because you're my wife.

Zoë: Right. Sir. Honey.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: Love, Marriage, Wife
“Sheriff Bourne: We had some, uh, unrelated trouble. His story had kind of an odor to it.

Inara Serra: Yes, it's not the only thing about him that does.”
— Inara Serra, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: odor, body odor
“That sounds like the Alliance. Unite all the planets under one rule so that everybody can be interfered with or ignored equally.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: Unity
“Tell you what I think. I figure that fella we run into did everyone on board. Killed 'em all. Then he decided to take a swim, see how fast his blood would boil out his ears.”
— Jayne Cobb, Firefly, Season 1: Bushwhacked
Tagged: Murder, blood boiling
“Jarvis: [Thor has just thrown a thunderbolt on Iron Man] Power to four-hundred percent capacity.

Tony Stark: How about that?”
— Tony Stark / Iron Man, The Avengers
Tagged: Power, thunderbolt
“[to Bruce Banner] You really have got a lid on it, haven't you? What's your secret? Mellow jazz? Bongo drums? Huge bag of weed?”
— Tony Stark / Iron Man, The Avengers
Tagged: Secret, Jazz, Weed, bongo drums
“Man is stronger by far than woman...yet only woman can create a child. Does that seem right to you?”
— Jubal Early, Firefly, Season 1: Objects in Space
Tagged: Man, Woman, strength, Childbirth
“The next time you decide to stab me in the back, have the guts to do it to my face.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: Ariel
Tagged: Guts, Backstabbing, Bravery
“It’s not embarrassing to be a virgin. It’s simply one’s state of being.”
— Inara Serra, Firefly, Season 1: Jaynestown
Tagged: virgin, Virginity, Being Yourself, embarrassing
“You couldn’t buy an invite with a diamond the size of a testicle.”
— Badger, Firefly, Season 1: Shindig
Tagged: Invite, Diamond, Testicle
“ Sir, I think you have a problem with your brain being missing.”
— Zoë Washburne, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: Stupid, insults, Anacephalic
“The way it is, is the way it is. We gotta deal with what’s in front of us.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: Serenity
Tagged: Practical, Pragmatic, Reality
“I'm not a Space Ranger. I'm just a toy. A stupid, little, insignificant toy.”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: space ranger, insignificant
“One minute you're defending the whole galaxy, and, suddenly, you find yourself sucking down Darjeeling with Marie Antoinette... and her little sister.”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: darjeeling, Marie Antoinette
“Buzz Lightyear: This is an intergalactic emergency. I need to commandeer your vessel to Sector 12. Who's in charge here?

All Aliens: [pointing up] The clawwwwwwwww!”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: Emergency, claw
“Buzz Lightyear: I am Buzz Lightyear; I come in peace.

Rex: [shaking Buzz Lightyear's hand] Oh, I'm so glad you're not a dinosaur!”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: i come in peace, Dinosaur
“Tracey: Do you think I’m stupid?

Malcolm: In every way possible!”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: The Message
Tagged: insults, Stupid
“Inara: Mal, you don’t have to die alone.


Malcolm: Everybody dies alone.”
— Tim Minear, Joss Whedon, Firefly, Season 1: Out of Gas
Tagged: Death, Alone, Dying Alone
“You can’t open the book of my life and jump in the middle. Like woman, I’m a mystery.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: Our Mrs. Reynolds
Tagged: Mystery, Book of Life
“Inara: Mal, if you're being a gentleman, I may die of shock.

Mal: Have you got time to do my hair?

Inara: Out!”
— Inara Serra, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: Gentleman, Hairdo
“Niska: Oh, you do not like I kill this man?

Mal: Oh no, I'm sure he was a...very bad person.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: Murder
“Steve Rogers: Doctor Banner, now might be a good time for you to get angry.

Bruce Banner: That's my secret, Captain: I'm always angry.”
— Bruce Banner / The Hulk, The Avengers
Tagged: Anger
“Buzz Lightyear: Sheriff, this is no time to panic!

Woody: This is the perfect time to panic! I'm lost, Andy is gone, they're gonna move from their house in two days, and it's all your fault!”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: Panic
“Buzz Lightyear: [Referring to Andy's other toys] Do you know these life forms?

Woody: Yes, they're Andy's toys.”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: life forms, Toys
“Do you know what the definition of a hero is? Someone who gets other people killed.”
— Zoë Washburne, Firefly, Season 1: Serenity
Tagged: Heroism, Irony, Antihero
“Someone ever tries to kill you, you try to kill them right back.”
— Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly, Season 1: Our Mrs. Reynolds
Tagged: overkill, Revenge, Reciprocation
“Strong is fighting. It’s hard and it’s painful and it’s every day. It’s what we have to do, and we can do it together, but if you’re too much of a coward for that, then burn.”
— Buffy Summers, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season 3: Amends
Tagged: Strong, Fighting, hard, Painful, coward
“Buzz Lightyear: I can't help. I can't help anyone.

Woody: Why sure you can Buzz Lightyear. You can get me out of here and then I'll get that rocket off you, and we'll make a break for Andy's House.”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: Helping, Cooperation
“Buzz Lightyear: I've set my laser from stun to kill.

Woody: Oh, great. If anyone attacks we can blink em' to death.”
— Buzz Lightyear (voice), Toy Story
Tagged: laser, Kill, death by blinking
“If you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.”
— Shepherd Derrial Book, Firefly, Season 1: Our Mrs. Reynolds
Tagged: Child Molestors, Sexual Advantage, Hell, Threats
“How we treat our dead is part of what makes us different...than those did the slaughtering.”
— Shepherd Derrial Book, Firefly, Season 1: Our Mrs. Reynolds
Tagged: Death, burial, slaughtering
“[after Inara has been doing Kaylee's hair and Mal has ordered her out]
Mal: You're servicing crew now.

Inara Serra: [snickers] In your lonely, pathetic dreams.”
— Inara Serra, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: Come-ons, shot down
“ We didn't fly 86 million miles to track down a box of Band-Aids, Colonel.”
— Hands of Blue, Firefly, Season 1: The Train Job
Tagged: band-aids, Space Travel
“Tony Stark: What's the stat, Rogers?

Steve Rogers: [looks at the Helicarrier tech] It seems to be powered by some sort of electricity!

Tony Stark: ...well, you're not wrong.”
— Tony Stark / Iron Man, The Avengers
Tagged: helicarrier, electric car
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