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Kelly Maxwell Quotes

Total quotes: 9
“Fuck with my Pablo, fuck with me. And I am done being fucked with, Ruby.”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 3: Baby Proof
Tagged: swearing, Vulgar, Challenge, stand up for yourself, Self-Confidence, badass, Strong
“Militia: I'm gonna get you pregnant later.

Kelly: Won't your sister be jealous of us?”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Fire in the Hole
Tagged: Insult, Incest, pregnant, Sex, flirty, Jealousy, Cheeky, joke, Rude
“I want a flamethrower. I'm serious! I lost my parents, got possessed. Flamethrower seems fair.”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Fire in the Hole
Tagged: Flamethrower, weapon, Loss, Possessed, Sassy, fair
“Kelly: Touch me again, and you're gonna need another wooden hand.

Ash: Okay, wait. Another wooden hand in place of my real hand, or another wooden hand in place of my wooden hand?

Kelly: Your real hand!”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: El Jefe
Tagged: Threat, Warning, Harassment, Sexual Harassment, joke, hand
“Ash: Okay, look, there is no way in hell they're gonna stay here, 'cause they're gonna get possessed, then they're gonna be on the night train to Kill-adelphia.

Kelly: With stops in Choke-lahoma City, and Die-ami.

Ash: Nice.

Kelly: I thought you'd like that.”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Bound in the Flesh
Tagged: Puns, City Puns, Violence, Possession, Kill, Die, choke, joke, Cheeky
“Ash's Hand: Kelly, when you were in junior high school, you told me you busted a stained glass window of a church.

Kelly Maxwell: By accident.

Ash's Hand: Then you punched a nun in the face.

Kelly Maxwell: She was being so dramatic about that stained glass, and she hit me first.”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 1: Bound in the Flesh
Tagged: Sassy, Violence, Church, Punch, Drama, Nun, high school, Irreverent, humor
“Ash: Kelly, what the hell did you do?

Kelly: He was a demon. I had to kill him before he killed us!

Ash: He's not a demon. He's Pablo! He was my friend! He was your friend too!

Kelly: His name wasn't Pablo. It was Reg. Just like my name isn't Kelly, it's Amanda, you whack job!”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: Delusion
Tagged: Kill, Violence, Death, demon, Identity, argument
“Ashy-Slashy: Peek-a-boo!

Kelly: What the fuck?

Ashy-Slashy: Wanna play?

Kelly: No. Ah, why am I talking to a Muppet?

Ashy-Slashy: Muppet? Uh, well, you're awfully judgmental for a...

Kelly: Hey! For a what? What were you gonna say, you little motherfuck? Sack up. What were you gonna say?

Ashy-Slashy: Wow, check out the potty mouth on you. You really are... filthy.

Kelly: And fine. Yeah, heard that one before, pervert.

Ashy-Slashy: Girl, you're the one with your handle all up in my puppet pooper. You want me to return the favor?”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: Ashy Slashy
Tagged: Puppet, Supernatural, Paranormal, Raunchy, Inappropriate, Insult, Rude, flirty, sexual, Pervert
“Ash: Holy pickle dicks, it's Lillian Pendergrass!

Kelly: What's a Lillian Pendergrass?

Ash: That beautiful creature right there. I'd know that caboose from anywhere.

Kelly: Are you having a stroke?

Ash: Hey, you say that now, back in the day, Lillian Pendergrass was a smoking hot former gymnast turned PhysEd teacher. You know what I'm talking about? She wore these tiny, little polyester shorts. You know during the summer, when you find that perfect peach?

Kelly: Your next words better be 'the end' or I will shoot us both. Me first.”
— Kelly Maxwell, Ash vs Evil Dead, Season 2: The Morgue
Tagged: Raunchy, Caboose, Peach, Beautiful, joke, Violence, Snarky
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