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Documentary Now! Quotes

“She was building a pink-eye army to infiltrate all of Oregon. It was diabolical because pink-eye is so contagious. ”
— Bill Dawes, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: Oregon , Pink Eye, Contagion, plan
“They had to scream their orgasms into jars so that they could be saved.”
— Bill Dawes, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: orgasm, Scream, Jars , Saved
“These people thought they were on a path to enlightenment. And unbeknownst to them, they were dressed like a bunch of drunks at a tailgate.”
— Larry Cooper, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: Enlightenment, Drunks, Tailgate , Path, Dressed
“That's a beautiful word, 'deal,' and you're talking to a dealer.”
— Father Ra-Shawbard, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: Deal, Word, Dealer
“Listen, you idiots. I work for the F.B.I.”
— Father Ra-Shawbard, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: idiots, FBI, Listen
“It did surprise me that a man who spoke of the purity of mind and soul had cocaine.”
— Ra-Tembler, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: surprise, Mind, Soul, Drugs, hypocrite
“Send someone to get my blue hat. I'm a little chilled. ”
— Father Ra-Shawbard, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: Chilled , Blue Hat
“Maybe I would have been nicer to the townspeople had they not been so fat and stupid.”
— Ra-Sharir, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: Nice, Townspeople, fat, Stupid, Rude
“The world has enough aggression and escalation without us adding to it.”
— Father Ra-Shawbard, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: World, Aggression, Escalation
“He just wanted me to be free and happy. And isn't that what a father is supposed to want for his children?”
— Ra-Tembler, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Batshit Valley
Tagged: father, Son, Love, support, Free, Happy
“World's always gonna need salesmen.”
— Pete Reynolds, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Globesman
Tagged: World, Sales, salesmen
“You know what I love about my job? I get to see the world everyday.”
— Pete Reynolds, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Globesman
Tagged: corny, Job, World, Sales
“You will not believe the number of people who hear a price like that and immediately try to Jew you down.”
— Tom O'Halloran, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Globesman
Tagged: Negotiation, Price
“You don't ruin a sale by pointing out mistakes!”
— Tom O'Halloran, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Globesman
Tagged: sale, upset, Mistakes
“What I wouldn't do for a nice old lady.”
— Tom O'Halloran, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Globesman
Tagged: Sales, Nice, Old Lady, Money, sweet
“When guests come over, and, you know, they see a globe, they're gonna know immediately they're in the presence of somebody who's worldly.”
— Tom O'Halloran, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Globesman
Tagged: guests, Worldly, Presence
“We have every kind of salsa. We have teriyaki. We have barbecue. We have peanut butter. Ranch dressing, that's important. ”
— Diego, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Juan Likes Rice and Chicken
Tagged: Salsa, taste, food, Toppings, Peanut Butter
“The coffee, every bean, is it your friend or enemy?”
— Arturo, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Juan Likes Rice and Chicken
Tagged: Coffee, ingredient, picky, Friend, Enemy
“R-U-I-N-E-D. There's only one way to say it, 'Rooned.'”
— Simon Sawyer, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Original Cast Album
Tagged: Pronunciation, Ruined, picky, Sassy
“I've always known exactly what I want and exactly how to get it.”
— Izabella Barta, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Waiting for the Artist
Tagged: Want, Control, Power, Confidence
“There is no courage in offending unless you are also willing to offend those you love.”
— Dimo, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Waiting for the Artist
Tagged: Courage, Offending , Love, Offensive
“I was always monogamous when I was with her.”
— Dimo, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Waiting for the Artist
Tagged: Monogomy, Love, Relationships, Infidelity, Cheating
“My core goal as an artist is to deconstruct the idea of working, of effort because we are raised to believe that great works of art require suffering.”
— Dimo, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Waiting for the Artist
Tagged: goal, Art, Artist, Effort, Suffering, Work
“I need you to find the comfort in the discomfort.”
— Izabella Barta, Documentary Now!, Season 3: Waiting for the Artist
Tagged: Comfort, Discomfort, Element, bold
“Leave it to Julie Andrews' little minion to [bleep] me over.”
— Jerry Wallach, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Mr. Runner Up
Tagged: Minon , Anne Hathaway , Julie Andrews , upset
“A bondage-themed, improvised movie with borderline-unattractive no-name actors. The anticipation for our masterpiece kept growing and growing.”
— Jerry Wallach, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Mr. Runner Up
Tagged: Improvised , actor, unattractive, Masterpiece, Art
“It was at that low moment that my indigenous friends introduced me to the cocaine leaf. Ten times more potent than the stepped-on powder sold in L.A. For the rest of the 70s, I lived like a jacked-up koala.”
— Jerry Wallach, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Mr. Runner Up
Tagged: Friends, Cocaine, Koala, Drugs, high
“We were determined to make the coke-iest movie ever.”
— Jerry Wallach, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Mr. Runner Up
Tagged: Movie, Coke, Goals, Projects
“Wipe that spaghetti sauce off your mouth, because I've got another project for you.”
— Jerry Wallach, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Mr. Runner Up
Tagged: spaghetti, Mouth, project
“It was an open secret in Hollywood. Like how Kevin Costner is three different people.”
— Jerry Wallach, Documentary Now!, Season 2: Mr. Runner Up
Tagged: Hollywood, Open Secret , Kevin Costner
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